SANATANI TIGERS: Members of the Hindutva Fascist students group, the Akhil Bharatiya Vidyarthi Parishad (ABVP), took out a demonstration and attacked the Delhi Zoo for flouting rules of prohibiting serving meat on Maha Shivaratri. "We deeply apologise for serving non-veg to our resident tigers. We were not aware that they also had to follow the rules of Hindutva but the kind ABVP goons told us that they are also Sanatani tigers", the local zookeeper said here earlier today. "As upholders of Sanatana Dharma, we are doing our duty to ensure that nobody in Bharat flouts the food rules that our society should run by. That's why we came to the zoo, right after attacking the canteens at the South Asian University", an ABVP student said here today referring to the incident at SAU where ABVP mobs attacked the mess representative over the serving of fish.

"Actually if you look now, today even the tigers are fasting from non-veg, you can even jump into the tiger enclosure and check for yourself", another ABVP student said before jumping into the tiger enclosure and eating a nice saatvik meal with the National Animal. This comes as caste and food rules are tightened around educational institutions so that Savarnas can skip eating meat on specific days and achieve karma and moksh while the Bahujans indulge in feasting on meat diets that gives unnecessary inputs like vitamins and proteins.

Meanwhile the South Asian University, which is an international university sponsored by the eight Member States of the South Asian Association for Regional Cooperation (SAARC) including Afghanistan, Bangladesh, Bhutan, India, Maldives, Nepal, Pakistan, and Sri Lanka, is reportedly going to be renamed as 'University of Akhand Bharat'. This comes as SAU sees increasing dominance of Hindutva influence by India such as when a doctoral research proposal on Kashmir’s ethnography and politics, which cites American linguist Noam Chomsky’s criticism of the NDA government, led to a show-cause notice being issued to a PhD scholar and a disciplinary inquiry against his supervisor at the South Asian University (SAU) now called UoAB. Afterall, the SAARC region is just better off as a United Bharat.